By in Humor

Embarrassed at Wal-Mart

I was at Wal-Mart and I thought I saw a woman wink at me. I'm a man, or once was. You see, raising five children sucks the life out of you and... Anyway, I waltz over while singing a Bee Gee’s tune to myself - "Well you can tell by the way I use my walk, I'm a woman's man, no time to talk. Music loud and women warm, I've been kicked around, since I was born..."

Well, my eyes aren’t what they used to be. I think it was just a fly in her eye.

I asked, "Do you work here?"

No response. "Is this shirt too macho?"

Nothing? "Do you like Penguins?"

Still no response...what a bi£€#!

A store clerk said "You do know that is a manikin?"

"...Well, of course... I did? You'd have to be a complete moron... not to notice... she's a manikin... really?"

Well, that would explain my splinter-ridden hand. I thought maybe she knew me and she was ignoring me like all women. Nevertheless, I still say she is a bi£€#!

I am the author, I originally published this on 11/08/14 -

Photo: Namibie Himba 0717

Provided by: wikimedia non-copyrighted free photos

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JanetHunt wrote on June 15, 2014, 11:04 PM

Oh boy! Time for new glasses again methinks! LOL!

RussTeed wrote on June 16, 2014, 9:22 AM

LOL, yup, these old peepers aren't what they used to be! &jhunt

DorothyGale wrote on June 24, 2014, 11:57 PM

Yup, definitely time for a new pair of glasses. Loved your line, "You see, raising five children sucks the life out of you." Made me laugh. :)

LoudMan wrote on July 15, 2014, 11:48 AM

And here I thought I was the only one who did this.

And, just WHERE did you find this picture of my girlfriend? Hmmm?

paigea wrote on July 16, 2014, 11:42 PM

Raising five kids would suck the life out of anyone. Funny story.