Those Words: It was his own fault!
I'm guilty. You're very probably guilty. Yes, likely we're all guilty. We're guilty of using the expression, "But it was his own fault!"
I knew a couple of young boys -twins- to whom I was never close. They were foolish boys, sons of a woman whom I had met. They were energetic young fellows.
Once I was in a men's room and there were two young girls in there. I politely shooed them out and told them there was a girls' room not far away. I did not recognize them as boys. But I digress. Suffice it to say we had different 'philosophies'.
Well, years later, I heard the boys, young men now, were out skiing and an avalanche struck, killing the one, although sparing the other. I felt shocked and highly sympathetic. That is, until...
Until I found out there was a No Skiing sign, citing the tendency of the area to suffer avalanches. The young fellows knew that, but with their devil-may-care attitude, they ignored the warning.
For the last couple of decades or so, we've come to have a saying where I live, "There's no cure for s-t-u-p-i-d." I now use that expression, whereas formerly I used the words, "It was his (or her) own fault!"
But are those words insightful? Are they fair? Are they kind? Are they a fair evaluation of the human condition? Not really.
What helped bring this change of heart to me? Last night, I dreamt I was out in the snow, when I came across an amazingly tall mound of snow. I was stuck in snow to nearly my neck and could not move. I wanted to get away, fast! I was afraid that mountain of snow, in the breezy environment, might fall on top of me. I was panicky. When I woke up, I realized I had mentioned that young man, the boy I had formerly known, to someone.
It's funny how we sometimes learn a lesson. I will try to be more sympathetic, even in cases where decisions leading to tragedy were foolish ones.
Image Credit » Pixabay https://pixabay.com/en/alpine-winter-landscape-snowy-605287/