By in Relationships

Do YOU Forgive?

Just about everyone can point to at least one friend they have in life. Similarly, just about everyone could point to someone in their life they don't particularly want to be around. Will Rogers, you know, was a liar.

Even if you answer Yes to the second statement, are you willing to forgive that person, not hold a grudge, wish them well, and press on with your life? Let me give you an example.

When I was a "wee tot" in kingergarten, first, and second grades (later I moved), there was this kid, Richard "Dick" Otway. Now I had entirely forgotten there was a Dick Otway. That is I'd forgotten him until a fellow playmate I just discovered the other day, reappeared! And he asked me about Dick.

I told him I didn't recall Richard, but somehow the name DID seem slightly familiar. I thought and thought and thought about him. And as that is the way my mind works, I eventually, through whatever processes were involved, realized I knew him and he was probably this bully guy I used to shy away from.

But I didn't mention this to my former playmate. So I looked for Richard online. BOOM! BANG! I found him DEAD. But not dead at 68, 57, 43, or even 35. Dead at 26. Now I just had to read his obituary. Eventually I did read it.

This poor guy worked as a bouncer and was shot dead. I was appalled. Murdered. Oh, the courts might not call it murder, but murder it was.

So I mentioned to my former school chum what I had thought Richard was toward me when I was a kid. He agreed wholeheartedly that he was a mean bully. So no doubt, he was. But you know something? I wish he was alive. I wouldn't want anyone to suffer needlessly. Anything he may have done toward me, I had forgiven.

And that is my way of life now. Do you forgive? Or do you gloat over the misfortunes of a person whom you felt mistreated you in life?

Image Credit » Pixabay

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MegL wrote on September 26, 2017, 3:48 PM

No matter your beliefs, I have found that forgiveness is very important. Continuing to hate or dislike someone for many years doesn't do them any harm, provided they don't know but it certainly harms the one feeling this way.

lookatdesktop wrote on September 26, 2017, 9:39 PM

I have had my share of grudges in the past but I understand your point. It is not good to want harm to come to someone or take pleasure in a bully's demise.

lookatdesktop wrote on September 26, 2017, 9:40 PM

Yes, holding grudges does cause personal self harm. It can make one feel bitter and hold bad memories that become deep if thought about regularly and never given a chance to just let things go.

Kasman wrote on September 29, 2017, 1:00 PM

I don't gloat over the misfortunes of others. I do forgive - but I don't forget!

VinceSummers wrote on September 29, 2017, 1:39 PM

Forgetting is a funny thing, Bill. Forgetting can employ simply not recalling a fact or event. And most of us don't forget an emotion-arousing event altogether. But we can forget in the sense of not letting an event weigh in as testimony either for or against a person or and occurrence.

Angeles wrote on September 29, 2017, 4:25 PM

If you hate, you're the only one suffering those killing bad vibrations. Meanwhile, the hatred person will be living his/her life without noticing. -Unless you make him/her know about your feelings, of course.-
But back to your question, ok, I hate, but it will last some minutes. The bad thing about this is I never forget. (First time I say this in public, ouch!)