By in Personal

The Dark Clouds Are Coming from Within

Randomness is not something I regularly do. I try to see patterns and organize things in my head. But this morning I feel like things are firing willy-nilly and I do not want to stop to analyze, order or find commonalities. And it feels like big, dark clouds are hanging over my head.

So, here is what is going off in my head this morning:

  • In 10 hours, there are only 15 new coins in my bank this morning.
  • I still have to get paperwork scanned.
  • My ex-son-in-law has filed for a discretionary review with the state Supreme Court over the divorce trial Court holding him in contempt for not taking the parenting class he was ordered, and sanctioning him for that (and other things).
  • My daughter is...well, my daughter. At 40-years-old, she makes different decisions than I would make, and does not see (or perhaps, it is that she does not admit) that her modus operandi is partnered with his dance steps.
  • I am still exhausted, despite having slept.
  • I still have to get to the bank this morning and take care of the financial business of the month.
  • I have received my flight information from Seattle to Tampa and return. Long-assed flights to which I am NOT looking forward, especially arriving at midnight in Florida.
  • I picked up Downton Abbey Season 5 at the library yesterday.
  • Tomorrow I have and appointment for a hair cut and color, and need to make one for my nails and am not sure where to find the time for any of it.
  • I want to relax and not feel like I have to run around taking care of everything and everybody else.
  • I am not feeling like I have accomplished much since returning.
  • I am annoyed at the world.

I am nearly certain that I could come up with more that is bouncing around in my brain, but this dozen is enough. And I am not happy that it is difficult for me to see the positive in much of it this morning. I feel that the big, dark clouds are over-powering me today.

So, this is where I will ask all of you to help me by turning some of these from gloom into goodness.

We all have our days...yes, even me.

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Copyright © 2015 Coral Levang

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Coins: 12599; $18.90; 94%

Image Credit » by ganusch

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alexdg1 wrote on November 3, 2015, 2:38 PM

Well, you could always check out my posts (especially yesterday's) to see pics of my beautiful girlfriend Loreley and me at a Halloween party. That should cheer you up some.

lexiconlover wrote on November 3, 2015, 2:46 PM

The last two days have been kind of grouchy here as well. I'm getting ready to shower the hair dye out of my hair and then eat some leftover fish tacos.

CoralLevang wrote on November 3, 2015, 2:50 PM

That they did. It's great to see you with a smile on your face. And you are a rather dashing Indiana Jones!

CoralLevang wrote on November 3, 2015, 2:51 PM

I'm just spent and feeling like there is no end in sight. Or maybe it's the damned holidays approaching.
Fish tacos sound good.

alexdg1 wrote on November 3, 2015, 2:59 PM

Why, thank you! I'm pleased that you like my Indy look. But.....What did you think about Loreley (Lorie)? Isn't she gorgeous? I think I fell in love with her on our second lunch date.

Last Edited: November 3, 2015, 3:10 PM

lexiconlover wrote on November 3, 2015, 3:16 PM

Yeah I have mixed feelings on the holiday thing. And they were very good.

WordChazer wrote on November 3, 2015, 3:35 PM

Hope everything sorts itself out soon. Pampering will help - it always does, even if you're busy!

LeaPea2417 wrote on November 3, 2015, 4:04 PM

Well, with all that you mentioned above, there is one thing that I think you will truly enjoy and that is Season 5 of Downton Abby. It is a good Season.

MegL wrote on November 3, 2015, 6:09 PM

When stuff is running round inside my head I stop. I might take a cup of tea or coffee and sit down for 15 minutes and try to think of nothing or alternatively read a bit of a book (not surf if possible). Then, i ask my self, "What is the most important thing I have to do right now?" I do it. Then I repeat. I also ask myself "Can I do anything about X?" X being a problem running round in my head. Sometimes the answer is "no"> It might be worry about someone else but if they are of age and I cannot change them, then actually realising that helps me relax and strike another off the list. I think I would strike your son in law's filing and your daughter's modus operandi off the list - you cannot do anything about them! You have already got stuck into improving your coin balance emoticon :grin:

markgraham wrote on November 3, 2015, 7:26 PM

We had the same kind of day it seems. The only good part was I able to help two students with some questions on some papers they had to do by tomorrow on my online teaching assistant job.

DWDavisRSL wrote on November 3, 2015, 8:53 PM

I hope that getting things out like that helped clear them from your mind, or at least allowed you to pigeon hole them so they aren't bouncing about as much.

Lillybell wrote on November 3, 2015, 10:47 PM

That is quite a list! I hope everything works out for you and your family

Paulie wrote on November 4, 2015, 1:37 AM

I would say it is most important for you to get your paperwork scanned and banking taken care of. Good luck and I wouldn't worry too much for slow coin earnings once in a while.

CoralLevang wrote on November 4, 2015, 4:21 AM

Just venting and then taking a nap helped a bit. Now it's the wee hours and I feel better. LOL

CoralLevang wrote on November 4, 2015, 4:23 AM

LeaPea2417 I've watched the first four episodes yesterday, and there certainly are some interesting twists. To see the Dowager's shocked look when she saw the Russian Prince was priceless in and of itself!

CoralLevang wrote on November 4, 2015, 4:31 AM

MegL Just being able to write/vent helped. I try so hard not to allow the "overwhelm" mode that it's odd for me to write something like this, as I don't like to complain. I have to say that my EX-son-in-law is not someone I allow myself (any longer) to get to me too much. The episodes are certainly short-lived, but it is easy to get caught up in it from time-to-time when my defenses are down. emoticon :winking: And learning to let go of the "help me" mode, when someone won't do what is needed for oneself, is what is needed here. I know this comes from within...myself included. It's hard enough orchestrating my own symphony that is starting to be a bit more in concert. This post was the momentary cacophony in my head ! I like the 15 minute strategy. Thank you. Hugs.

CoralLevang wrote on November 4, 2015, 4:32 AM

I like the idea of an online TA job. Is that through your advanced studies that you got this job?

CoralLevang wrote on November 4, 2015, 4:35 AM

Living alone I do not vent much. I rarely do so with others, as many I know are "freaked out" by knowing I get overwhelmed; they see me as some sort of pillar, and cannot handle that I, too, have my bad days. So, yes, this was more about things not bouncing off the walls of my being. Thank you so much, DWDavisRSL . emoticon :smile:

CoralLevang wrote on November 4, 2015, 4:36 AM

Thank you, Lillybell . I just need to stop and breathe sometimes. emoticon :smile:

CoralLevang wrote on November 4, 2015, 4:37 AM

Paulie I did neither of those things, so Wednesday will be the day for the banking. I cannot put that one off!!
I slept off and on today, and was able to watch 4 episodes of season 5 of Downton Abbey.

markgraham wrote on November 4, 2015, 10:07 AM

Yes, for the company one must be a graduate student or already have a master's or higher.