Prepare for the Worst, Hope for Better
Replete with pens, steno notebook, and the desire to be of support to my grown daughter in whatever way I can be, I will be leaving the comfort of my own little world soon to bolster myself up to sit as an observer in a courtroom tomorrow and for however long it will take for a judge to make a ruling on a divorce that should have been over before first of this year.
Though many may believe I relish an opportunity to see these kinds of proceedings, it breaks my heart to see someone, who claimed to love and promised to care for a young woman 21 years ago, go out to publicly destroy her and anything she has built or anyone who may cross his path.
There is always more than two perspectives, but this will be a time when my perspective will not be considered, or even desired. Personality-wise, I am the one much more likely to stand up to the nonsense, rather than try to be conciliatory in a situation that is clearly highly toxic, and has (likely) always has been, evidenced by the patterns of isolation over the years.
That being said, learning to sit on the sidelines to watch those you love endure the sheer evil that some will dish, or the pain of seeing all in which you once believed dashed at the very mention of a name is something we must all face. Suddenly when we realize that our children are the same age we were when going through the toughest experiences of life. Yet, they may make very different choices.
It is my hope that, once in front of a judge, this will be the beginning to a time where she can revisit who she is, no longer a teenager who feels the need to choose between parental control and narcissistic control, which may often be confused as the same thing.
I pray that the judge is compassionate and fair, disallowing the ugliness that has been going on far too long. And I remind myself to trust that when one (or many) continues to do what is just, right, and fair out of love for humankind, those who intent on hurting others will eventually fall, whether or not one is in the front row seat to watch.
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I will be unavailable for the rest of today and all of tomorrow. I will try to check in tomorrow night (late). Please keep Persona Paper active so I have something other than the matters at hand to occupy my thoughts. Please keep writing, don't forget me or my family; and, if you are so inclined, I have nearly 500 posts on which you could challenge me. But I have to warn you: I might be loaded for bear!
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© Copyright 2015- Coral Levang - All Rights Reserved
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