By in Personal

Yes, I'm Still Alive

This interruption in your regularly scheduling has been brought to you by anxiety and psychosis. We now return to your regularly scheduled writing.

I haven't written for a week due to my life being a complete tornado of stress. Last week, I had a wonderful episode of anxiety induced paranoia. Leaving the IOP program, not being able to go to the drop in center, and being stuck in a house with 2 kids all day was a big change. By Thursday, I was out of this world paranoid - though everyone hated me, was out to get me, etc. I had some interesting hallucinations as well. I was doing yard work over the weekend and thought I saw a Tasmanian Devil (the real type, not the cartoon type) run across the yard. At least that was a little amusing, everything else sure wasn't.

The family I'm babysitting for also had a crisis, the kid's one grandpa had a stroke. So, half the family rushed into town while he was hospitalized. This meant extra kids - 5 at one point - including 4 year old twins. Even though there was always at least one other adult around helping me with them all, it was overwhelming. Thankfully today, everyone has gone back home and I'm back to just watching the two as originally planned. Their grandpa has made a wonderful recovery, almost 100%, and will be heading back home tomorrow.

I've at least managed to do a few positive things during all this. I went to a Rascal Flatts concert with a friend last Friday - which was great. I also didn't have to work on Monday so I went to the drop in center then out for coffee with friends. Saturday a bunch of us are going out to lunch then to play miniature golf or something. Having a social life is a new thing for me, but its rather cool.

Image Credit » by neufal54

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alexdg1 wrote on June 4, 2015, 3:21 PM

I'm glad to see that you are feeling a bit better, at least. Stress can trigger off the strangest and most unpleasant mental health issues. Stout heart!

Ruby3881 wrote on June 4, 2015, 4:16 PM

It sounds like you're managing well, despite the occasional bumps in the road!

msiduri wrote on June 4, 2015, 4:26 PM

YIKES! Well, I'm glad things are going more smoothly now. Take care and enjoy the time with friends. It really is the best time.

MegL wrote on June 4, 2015, 6:03 PM

Glad to hear you are feeling better. It's not much fun looking after children when you may feel you want to be looked after yourself?

AliCanary wrote on June 5, 2015, 1:02 AM

I'm glad your stressful time is over and that you have some cool activities to look forward to!

CoralLevang wrote on June 14, 2015, 7:03 PM

Rascal Flatts concert sounds terrific! I am not a country fan, particularly, but that is one group I enjoy. I hope you are doing some more "cool" things. You deserve it!